IMPERFECT

I tried, but could not do it.

I stuttered, stumbled

And sometimes mumbled.

Feeling ashamed and so foolish

I hid.

Rying, screaming

And pouting like a kid.

I open my eyes

Only to realise…

I have failed.

I’ve failed you/

I’ve failed myself

I’ve failed everyone too.

I stutter, mumble

Titter, tumble

Stumble, tremble

And finally…

Crumble.

I try again,

I could not do it.

I stuttered stumbled

And sometimes mumbled.

I open my eyes,

To realise

I’m not a failure

Not at all.

It is ok to run,

Its ok to hide.

Its ALL OK because I tried.

I hope in you I can confide.

I’ll tell you a secret…

I’m not perfect

Not always correct, not always the best…

But it’s ok.

- This piece entirely speaks to the place I am now, one of my mentors and favourite motivational speakers, Eric Thomas, speaks of the three stages in life, which are: getting out of a storm, going through the storm and just getting into a storm. Yet he also speaks about rising above, rising above the clouds… so that even when a storm arises you are above the clouds and unable to be affected. In this journey we all outgrow certain phases, it doesn’t mean these things don’t exist anymore we have just outgrown them. I believe that there will always be some form of pain or discomfort or at least the threat of it throughout our lives, but the trick to being and being successful is to outgrow the pain, where the obstacle has not been destroyed, but where a new realisation has been birthed.

High school was not a pretty picture, but I sure am glad that my adolescent years are OVER! All the pressure of wanting to desperately fit in and please everyone was daunting and it took its toll on me. As I grow older I find myself growing more tolerant to the balance of my own imperfections and my ability and willingness to strive to be better (although I am pretty close to perfect!.. …. …. and that lame insert-of – joke just proved otherwise).

THE FIRST ARCHIVES- A poetic journey into and through adolescence